Miramar Beach and Half Moon Bay

The day after Christmas, I drove to the ocean.

(To avoid seeing STBX)

It was a winsome day.

(I'm learning myself new words for beautiful.)

I felt joy!

I parked at Miramar Beach and walked

up and down the coast for about 4 hours.

I took pictures and listened to my new iPod

(my sons are awesome!!!!!!).

I have no idea who built this or why, but it was a wonderful photo opportunity.

This shack was right on the cliff above the ocean.

I would happily live here -

walking up and down the ocean

I had a silly grin on my face -

imagine if I actually lived there!

Then I drove to Half Moon Bay -

found the main street shop walking place,

got out and walked.

This place had all kinds of cool stuff outside

like a bathtub full of broken glass.

This was the dog parking spot.

Lots of people had their dogs, and lots of shops

(probably all of them!)

did not allow pets inside.

And, finally, here is a church with dark clouds over it.

And that was my Sunday.

How was yours?

FIDTGB

Casa de Refugio Also Accepts Dogs

This is "Scarlet"

- so named because she is covered in scars and has one gaping wound

- which I just treated with neosporin covered with a bandage pad

and wrapped with tape

(and she let me).

I must say that a pit bull is a dog that I have a healthy fear of.

They are powerful and awesome animals.

One snap and my little P'Headro would be done for.

Scarlet is a sad little thing though.

She is skinny skinny skinny.

And she has all kinds of wounds all over her body.

Roomer (Hold See's friend) De'Rone found her Christmas night,

at about midnight, running in the road

(or standing, I don't know)

by the low income apartments down the road from us.

He texted me the next day -

What?, was my response.

I went downstairs and there she was

curled up in a tight little ball on his bed.

Today I had him bring her upstairs to see how she got along

with P'Head and Callie.

They all seem to get along ok -

although Callie really does not like

that Scarlet curls up on the couch

(Callie hasn't been able to get on the couch

for a long time).

Callie has barked barked three times at Scarlet.

Scarlet doesn't seem to mind or care.

Scarlet sleeps most of the time.

She has eaten some,

peed in the house twice and pooped, in the house,

once.

Despite all the walks.

Da'Rone made flyers and will post them

(he has already posted by the apartments).

I am not sure what will happen with Scarlet,

but she is pretty comfortable here now.

I am going to google pit rescues;

see if someone will take her.

Da'Rone knows someone who wanted a dog,

and maybe he'll take her.

She's sweet, for now,

but do I want another dog?

Will she work with Callie and P'Headro

once she wakes up and feels better?

Things that make you say hummmm?

FIDLGB

It Was a Good Day

Today was a good day.

I was with my family and I love them very much.

We had good food and good fun.

We had tequila jello shooters.

We rushed off to the movie theater at 11:20 in the am to see True Grit.

There were so many people there.

I was so happy for my Ditkas.

They have many fans.

People were actually laughing!

I have sat through so many Coen brother movies where I was the only person laughing.

Today the whole theatre was laughing!

(Although someone behind Chloe said, "I don't understand why these people are laughing." - Sounds like my STBX - who was not present today by my request - I mean who leaves his wife after Thanksgiving and expects to spend Christmas with her - although I am sure it was the kids he wanted to be with - not me - So he will be here tomorrow and I will not - driving to the ocean in the rain - that's what I will be doing - yes indeed - anyway back to how great today was.....)

I am so happy and proud that the Coens are doing so well - although there is a part of me who doesn't want to share them....what's that about?

Anyway, today was a good day!

I hope all of you had a day at least as good as mine. At least.

FIDLGB

So Guess What I Figured Out This Morning @ 1:30 in the AM?

I got played!

(Now I know you are all thinking, Duuuuhhhh!)

How is it that a fairly intelligent modern hip woman did not figure this out at the time? Or any time in the 37 years?

I don't know - you tell me.

Life goes on, and I'm still getting ready for Christmas.

It will come whether I'm ready or not,

but I'd like to ride the wave rather than get all crashed up in it.

We'll see.

FIDLGB

Does it Have to be Sawed Off to Work?

I'm just asking.

FIDLGB

Funny Quote of the Day

I just spent 4+ hours negotiating a treaty with the STBX.

(I will get it written up in legalese,

we will sign it - notarized

and attach it to the divorce.)

I have not talked with him since he left

Thanksgiving weekend.

We have emailed - mostly to set up this meeting -

that and the well problem -

dirty water coming out of the faucet -

but as for face to face talking (or even phone) -

this was our first.

We were supposed to have a budget worked out

and we did -

we were quite close in what we think it takes to run

Casa de Refugio.

I cried a great deal

and he did some, too.

In the midst of the 4 hours,

I asked some questions

about the high school sweetheart girlfriend

and their relationship.

All is not well.

She has some trust issues.

Imagine that!

But here is my reason for posting -

my Quote of the Day -

"Well, I guess I didn't know her

as well as I thought I did......"

Thank you for reading.

FIDLGB

(By the way,

did you see the Dude on Saturday Night Live?

Jeff Bridges says he's not the Dude,

but I am so not convinced!)

There's a big empty hole where you used to be

I was going to blog about the above title, but there's nothing else to say about that.

No sadness, no anger,

just a big empty hole.

Then I read Ananda's last post and...... well, in my head, Lauck's and stbx are tied together in two fundamental ways......

(Ahh the Internet. Is there nothing you can't find a picture of?)

Way back in the day,

on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving,

I was leaving school

(city college - where all smart shoppers go to avoid being a senior in high school...since their parents refuse to allow them to go back to that hippie dippie free school),

on foot -

(that's how I got most everywhere back then,

that and hitching, bumming a ride and taking the bus -

just ask Ananda) -

and this scraggly

(lots of guys are scraggly in the 70's)

guy comes running up to me and asks me for my phone number.

I have seen him a couple of times before - in the music building and the cafeteria.

I debate -

give him a real number or a fake number, real or fake, real or fake?

Ah what the heck, at least he's tall enough

(at 6 feet, most of the males who have shown interest in me are not tall enough)

-real.

What does this have to do with Lauck's, you ask?

Ahh, Lauck's was the bakery of choice for my family.

My job this Thanksgiving was to pick up the rolls for Thanksgiving dinner.

Which is why I was leaving the school out this entrance at this particular time.

To be accosted by this scraggly stealer of years and sucker of life.

All I had to do was give him the wrong number.

Really.

But then what about my beautiful children?

What indeed.

Again, I'll go with "The best mistake I ever made."

The doorway where Ananda and I cracked up after the wild boy took out his rubber - again see her blog for more details....)

Lauck's also made our wedding cake.

FITLGB

Feeling a Wee Bit Better

So, here's my last photo of my STBX. I mean who takes off their shirt in November to get sun while driving to family dinner on Thanksgiving day?

He does.

There is a long list of strange things that he does, not the least of which is leaving me.

Oh well, his loss, my gain!

As the title implies, I am on the mend. Turns out I had a bacterial infection and needed antibiotics! Which I have not taken in years, and are doing a number on my stomach. Yuck!

Probiotics, yogurt and lots of water. (I need - haven't really done yet, though.) (I talk big!)

Just wanted yous to know what's up with me. Right now. That's right......

FITLGB

Saturday

I don't usually do this, but this year, on Black Friday, I went to Best Buy, and bought for myself a wireless blu ray player.

I am sure glad that I did.

That night my STBX announced his soon to be ex status, and all bets were off.

I haven't bought any other presents, for myself or others, since.

I haven't even gone grocery shopping since (I need to - very low on food here).

Any hoo - we are enjoying the

Netflix streaming feature.

We are currently watching a documentary about Howard Zinn.

Joe-Ash likes documentaries.

History.

I like comedies, off beat comedies is how Netflix had pigeon-holed my comedic tastes.

Any hoo, I have my feet up, the Netflix's going and I'm not feeling too good (got a sore throat and am living on Advil Cold and Sinus).

But overall life ain't too bad, all things considered.

FITDLGB

Not Much to Say

sonofabitch!

FIDLGB

My Family Rocks!

So, you know how I am ending my recent blog entries with

"Fuck it, Dude. Let's go bowling."?

Well my awesome kids indulged me tonight.

First we went out for Thai food - which was good - yummy!

And then we went bowling!

And Chloe bought a round of White Russians!

It brought tears of joy to my eyes to be so blessed!

What a treat for us Achievers!

I am so thankful for my kids.

I would never have had them if it weren't for that crazy dude who married me even though he was in love with someone else.

So it wasn't a bad thing after all, in the end.

I once worked with a woman who said that her marriage was the best mistake she ever made, because of her kids.

I know what she means.

Fuck it, Dude. Let's go bowling!

Thirty Seven Years

In 1973 I was 18 and beautiful (all 18 year olds are beautiful).

In 1973, the ATM machine was patented, Spiro T. Agnew resigned as the Vice President of the United States and Duane Lee Chapman II (Dog's son) was born.

Now in 2010, 37 years later, I am old and beautiful (all 56 year olds are beautiful).

We have seen Obama's luster fade, a volcano in Iceland and J.D. Salinger die.

Thirty seven years is a long time to be in a relationship.

Fuck it, Dude. Let's go bowling!

I'm Sad Today - and Tired

I hit the wall, tired and sad wise, at about 3:30 p.m. today.

I did not sleep one night this past weekend, right after driving home from Thanksgiving and finding out about the Mister's newest betrayal. Did not sleep much at all.

So I'm missing a night's worth of sleep.

I listened to Blood on the Tracks on the way to work, and back home again - about 35 minutes each way.

"When something's not right, it's wrong" was my first Facebook post, post The End (you know when he told me and that great iron door shut down in me for good).

So I looked on Youtube for a version of You're Gonna Make Me Lonesome When You Go to share with you, but I couldn't find any with Bob doing it - although I looked about 10-15 entries.

This was my favorite:

I'm lonesome.

Fuck it, Dude. Let's go bowling.

Well, I Guess Second Honeymoons Aren't Guaranteed

Me and the Mister is officially Splitsville. And it ain't my fault (directly).

He was in love before he met me and he has been back and forth with the lady love several times during our 37 year relationship.

And now he's made his choice, again, and there you have it.

The kids are grown and I AM DONE!!!!!!!!!

So I will be getting a divorce and finding a new life.

I just might blog about it, too.

Why not? I am thinking I will have lots of extra energy, not having to deal with the emotional baggage.

Of course, that sounds silly, 'cause what are divorces but emotional whirlwinds with baggage flying all over?

But I gotta make myself a new life, and I think I will need to process it through writing.

And blogs make your writing look so pretty!

So here I go!

Fuck it, Dude, let's go bowling!